Mean Reds

This morning I woke up with the Mean Reds, that's how Truman Capote describes feeling worse than The Blues in Breakfast At Tiffany's. I started my run with dragging feet, trying to think of why I felt like there was sludge in my brain.
Did I listen to really sad music the day before? I didn't think so. I've learned I can only take sad tunes in small doses. If I have Elliot Smith playing all day, as I clean toilets, mop floors and fold laundry, in the moment I feel alive, awakening strong feelings I don't often tap into, however, the next day I feel like I'm recovering from a tequila paved hangover. An epic emotional hangover.
I thought it might be from finally finishing The Liars' Club, and maybe I was sad that the book was over, or that her childhood was so awful. I told my mom I thought she'd like the book, saying, "Mom, you'll like this book. You kind of remind me of Mary Karr." Then I told her the story, and she said, "Alicia, I had a very happy childhood. Why do you think I grew up like that?"
"I don't think you had a shitty childhood, but I think you talk real Southern, like Mary Karr. You say "warsh" for fucks sake. You'd like her tone." My mom acknowledged the commonality.

I settled on my funk being the outcome of greedily attacking a box of ice cream yesterday. In total, from all my back and forth trips to the freezer, I shoveled a gallon of ice cream in my mouth. It's hot as fuck again, so I was feeling bad for myself and turned to eating therapy.

When I wasn't trying to pinpoint the source of my distress, I was shirt-tugging, self conscience that my pants were sheer in the sunlight and I was showing off my bare butt to some lucky morning commuters. I decided to go commando because my undies were too thick rimmed, and I didn't feel like wasting a clean pair on my jog. Aside from not possibly showing off my butt, a nice cotton pair of briefs would have been a great buffer for the coochie equivalent of a 5 o'clock shadow. Hindsight is 20/20.

I think I will feel better if I start cleaning my dirty ass house, getting feng shui in order. After the kids and I got back from music class, I ate the rest of the ice cream because I need it out of my life. I'll offset whatever damage the ice cream will do by eating a pound of kale for dinner. It's already 106 degrees outside, so I'm not rushing to get the cleaning done yet. Were going to be trapped in doors all day, and other than cleaning, all I need to do is make kale, and heat two hot dogs for the kids to eat, with their kale. I'm all about offsetting bad food with kale.