An Involuntary Smile

Painting whales

Last night I woke up to Kiki laughing. When I walked down the hall to check on her, expecting to see her sitting up awake, I found her fast asleep, lightly snoring. I smiled to see her sleeping face, knowing she was having so much fun dreaming, and went back to bed.

That day we went to the zoo. As we were watching the flamingos a young girl came up to the wooden fence around the pond and started laughing maniacally, as if she was witnessing an entirely different scene. Two Pelicans were running around the perimeter. They looked like squat mad scientists, Doc Browns types, with heads full of long white wispy hairs. This could have been what she found so amusing. Her lack of inhibitions while cackling away at the fence was a sight to behold. I felt a tinge envious of her ecstatic bird watching.

I'm a regular at the zoo, and often think about if the animals prefer captivity, and come to different conclusions based on the animal. 

The stoic lions seem to have accepted their fate. Rather than try and pounce at people from behind the cage, spending day after day enraged, they meander around with their heads held high, unimpressed with the gawking crowds. Maybe they are building up resentment, waiting for the right moment to strike.

Kiki has a book about a class trip to a Sea Park. Her favorite part is where the class watches an orca whale show. She talks about the orca and how it splashes water on the crowd with excitement. I thought she would like to watch Blackfish because of her new interest.

In retrospect, Free Willy might have been a better choice. I saw Blackfish a while ago, and forgot how disturbing it is. It ended up being fine for her to watch because the violence is not shown, and the story is too complex for her to follow. All the talk about animal abuse and animals chewing up trainers is over her head. She is simply impressed by watching the killer whales. 

The orca Tillikum's first attack occurs at Sea Land, a water park in Victoria. Two women who witnessed the attack are interviewed, and it looks like the brunette is holding back a big smile while she describes the violent scene. There is a slight grin while she tells the story, a story she's told hundreds of times. Even as she offers condolences to the dead trainer's family, she appears giddy.

I'm assuming, it's the awkwardness of having a camera in her face as she goes through the gory memory. 

I once saw someone die in similar gore in Mexico. An old lady lost her balance at the top of a massive Mayan pyramid. I was at a distance from the base and watched her tumble from the peak of a very steep stone mountain to the base. The entire place fell silent as we watched. It looked fake, like a crash test dummy, her limp body tumbling down.

My dad is a doctor and my sister is a nurse, so they ran over to the base of the pyramid. They saw her bleeding, a body beaten so badly inside, it was oozing out of her gashes and cuts. An ambulance came and she was taken away.

When I tell this story to people I don't laugh or smile, but I conclude with a snort or chuckle, "it was one of the craziest things I have seen."

After Tillikum gobbles up his first victim, he gets shipped to Sea World where he picks off a few more trainers. Shockingly, Sea World still exists, and there is one pretty close to my house. I have the sense to not question the content of the documentary, and to boycott the sea park, even though Kingsley would really enjoy the show.

We won't see an orca show, take the chance of watching a killer whale use a trainer as a chew toy. I'd hate to think of Kiki's reaction. As a three year old, she couldn't understand captivity, retribution, animal abuse or the hopeful ambitions of animal trainers. She would think it's part of the show, and stand up, jumping, cheering and laughing at the scene. 

I'd be left to retell the story, and while explaining Kiki's involuntary gladiator spectating, a tiny smile would emerge, subtly indicating, I enjoyed the experience.

Zoo memories